You can insist they make it right.
You can stand your ground.
You can force them to repair the damage and be willing to part with them unless/until they do.
You can swallow the harm yourself.
You can say to the person, “I love you more than this damage you have done and I will continue to love you without insisting that you, first, make it right as a condition of my love.”
Human beings are self-involved by nature, and inextricably so. Most of us never get better. We are always self-absorbed. Truly loving such a creature means being willing to foot the bill when they continually screw it up.
Therapists call that “enabling.” They instruct us not to enable, but instead, to let people face the consequences of their own actions and hopefully clean up their act out of fear of the self-destruction that comes as a result of such self-involvement.
Forgiveness is enabling. It wrests us from the consequences of our actions. And forgiveness is freely given.
But just because grace is free, doesn’t mean grace is cheap. The purpose of the crucifixion, then, is to demonstrate in the most visceral terms possible how much it costs God to foot the bill for our selfishness.
The crucifixion is not for God.
The crucifixion is for us.
In the Song of Solomon, the author notes that, “Love is as powerful as death.”
The resurrection is the coda.
It simply notes that love is MORE powerful than death.
Thankful for a God who is guilty of love.